Saturday, January 30, 2010

Don't be mad when you see that he wants it

I totally discovered this channel off of someone who posted it on Facebook.  I am in love with this girl, her voice, her friend and his piano playing.  Utterly amazing.  Why are they not friends with me?! Seriously though, I think I love this.




That video was for the people who like 'popular' music.  Now, if you would like REAL music, watch this:



It has been a long weekend thus far. I just got home from work.  It is Midnight Thirty.  I am going to sleep.  I heart all your faces though!

Watch the video!

Thursday, January 28, 2010

Sundance Baby

For whatever reason, today was a rough day.  Everything hit today for me, when I realized that he would probably never talk to me again.  Nor, I am sure, does he ever care to speak to me again. 

That being said, Ryley, Tyler Harris and I went to SUNDANCE yesterday.  It was super fun.  We didn't see anyone famous at all, though we did have a grand scheme to pretend that Tyler was famous.  He was not thrilled about that idea, but Ryley and I thought it was great.  We did get some amazing chocolate, and pizza.  I made a movie, so, now we are the movie stars.

I am sure it was the best film made at Sundance this year.

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Farewell Loves I Have Known

WHAT? WHAT? JOANNA NEWSOM HAS A NEW SONG? Yes, friends, she does.  I was very excited to see this, as, for whatever reason, it touched me very much today.  Here is the video:



I highly recommend listening to the video, and reading the words along with it.  The video is not a music video, just pictures of Joanna. Here are the lyrics:

i found a little plot of land
in the Garden of Eden
it was dirt and dirt is all
the same
i tilled it with my two hands
and i called it
my very own
there was no one to dispute
my claim

well, you'd be shocked at the state of things:
the whole place had just cleared right out
it was hot as hell, so i lay me by the spring
for a spell, as naked as a trout

the wandering eye that i have caught
is as hot as a wandering sun
but i would want for nothing more
in my garden; start again
in the hardening to every heart but one

meet me in the Garden
of Eden
bring a friend
we are gonna have ourselves a time
we are gonna have a golden party
it's on me
no siree, it's my dime

we broke our hearts in the war between
St. George and the dragon,
but both in equal parts are welcome
to come along
i'm inviting everyone

farewell, two loves that i have known
even muddied as waters run
tell me, what is meant by sittin' alone
in a garden, seceded
from the Union in the year of '81?

the unending amends you made
are enough for one life; be done
i believe in innocence, little darlin'; start again
i believe in everyone

i believe, regardless
i believe in everyone

Good night all, We are going to Sundance tomorrow.  I am going to find me Jim Parsons and HE WILL LOVE ME!

Sunday, January 24, 2010

No one knows, we only guess..just a leap for happiness...

WOW.  WOW. WOW. Ok.  This weekend, has possibly been one of the craziest ever in my LIFE. What was a terrible situation, actually turned into a great one. Not because I got back together with Duane, but because I learned some interesting tidbits, and am finally able to get rid of the lies, and look forward to boys who know how to tell the truth. 

While my pride is, of course, hurt by some things I found out over the course of the last few days, I am glad it turned out the way that it did.  I honestly feel like a huge weight has been taken off of my shoulders because I do not have to continue to feel oppressed by Duane's waffling.  I made a decision, which he did not want me to make, and I made it of my own accord, and with the knowledge of everything.  I am happy once again, and looking forward to super fantabulous times in the future.

I am pretty amazing like that, I know. 

Now, I am sure you all were hoping that I would be telling dirty, gritty details on my blog.  While, you know that I am quite an open person, there are some choice people who blog stalk me.  I don't want any feelings to be hurt, or anything to be said here that could possibly damage a fledgling relationship.  Therefore, I have chosen to stay silent.  I know, now you all are just wondering what the story is, and are BITING YOUR NAILS in anticipation. 

Well, I, personally, like shoes, boys who dance, candy, and...............oh, I like friends of friends who are single.  I am able to be bribed with all of the above for the story if you want it.  BUT, I will only accept the above as bribes.  Sorry. 

On a completely different note, I HIGHLY recommend the Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus.  Excellent film, and my lover Heath Ledger was in it, as his last performance. And, the amazing Paloma Faith. When she came on screen I yelled 'I LOVE YOU PALOMA FAITH' like a 17 year old fan girl watching Twilight.  For. Serious.


I was going to post the title song for this blog, however, EMBEDDING IS DISABLED!!!! Therefore, I highly recommend clicking HERE

PS. "Hello, my name is Lindsay, I have been Taylor Swift free for three days." 
      "Hi Lindsay!"

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

YOU KNOW WHY!

Alright, I am halfway between depressed and angry.  Half the time I want to just yell it out until I feel better, and the other half I am in this stupor of unconsolableness (yeah, I made that up just now, SNAP).  That being said, I have to say that I think this is my first TRUE break up ever.  With Ian, it was a divorce, and a family involved.  With Darin, he stopped talking to me for like, five days, and I am better than that.  (For those of you who don't know, I dated a boy named Darin about two years ago.  Obviously...we broke up). Then, relationships before that were weird and just faded away.  So, yes, this is the first time I think I really get to experience what every 19 year old girl is experiencing right now. 

And, in accordance with what 19 year old girls do after a break up I have spent my morning listening to Taylor Swift.  I COULDN'T STOP.  My mind was screaming 'WHY, WHY ARE YOU LISTENING TO TAYLOR SWIFT?'.  Not that there is anything wrong with Taylor, just not my style.  FINALLY, I decided to put my IPOD on shuffle.  And guess what pops up? Oh yeah, Red Balloon.  THIS IS THE SONG DUANE WROTE FOR ME! Ok not really, but I always considered it our song because he wrote it while I was there with him.  OMG EVEN THE CAR IS TRAUMATIC IN TIMES LIKE THESE. 

FINALLY, finally, some good broadway came on.  It is hard to feel in love, or hurt when you can rock out to a song like Madame Guillotine.  It was good times. 

Also, tonight I am going to go see The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus.  I am super excited about it.  I am sure I will blog about it.  It has Heath Ledger in it, Johnny Depp, Jude Law, and Paloma Faith.  So, it should be awesome times.

Monday, January 18, 2010

I lied, I am going emo again READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!!!!

Alright, so I am still slightly freaking out a little bit.  I knew that breaking up with Duane was going to hurt, and be hard, and all that jazz.  I don't think I quite realized how much it would throw me off though.  You see, for over a year I had a routine.  I would come home, put the babies to bed, and then I would spend 2-5 hours of my night talking to the boy I loved, and hanging out with him.  He was literally my best friend who I told everything to.  If I had a bad day, he would listen to me beast.  If I had stories, he would listen to me recount them.  If I just wanted to sit and crochet, he would read a book, or do his vocabulary words or something while we just sat and chatted once in awhile. 

Now that he decided that he wanted to move on to bigger (literally his girlfriend is bigger than me) and more exciting things (which I doubt she is, I am pretty FREAKING EXCITING), I don't have this! Not only did I lose the boy I loved desperately, but I lost my best friend! GAH! It is driving me a little bit nuts. 

You see, I didn't actually think that it would be this hard, but now that the routine is broken, at 8:30, when we were usually talking, I find myself wandering around helplessly, wondering what to do.  Thank goodness there have been new shows on again.  They are my salvation (JACK BAUER I LOVE YOU). 

That being said, last night I was in a bit of a rut.  I went and looked on his facebook, which I shouldn't have done, because it just hurt my feelings.  I am probably going to have to log in to his account and change his settings to private so that I can't see his page.  And no, not really.  I wouldn't REALLY do that...I am not a *cough* estalker *cough*.  Ok, I am, just a little bit though.  ANYWAYS, so I was feeling really down, and luckily, I have met a new friend who lives in the UK. I met him through little Miss Cornelia, and his name is Seb.  He also stays up RIDICULOUSLY late (for him).  He happened to be on skype at Duane and I's normal chat time, so I was able to vent it out to him.  Then, Miss Cornelia got on skype, and we decided to do a three way video chat.  This was quite amusing for the simple fact that we couldn't figure out how to get video AND audio at the same time. Now, I am sure you are saying to yourself "that sounds like the lamest and saddest thing anyone could possibly ever do after a break up." I ASSURE YOU IT IS NOT! It was super good times, and we laughed a lot, mostly because it was 7:00 in the morning for Seb, and midnight and one am respectively for me and Cornelia.  It was some fun times.

So, thank you Miss Cornelia and Mr. Seb.  I appreciate you helping me in my moment of need.  Along with everyone else who has allowed me to rant, and prevented me from e-stalking. (Ryley, Kim, Colin, Seb, Cornelia............oh and MOM.......)  As for now, this is what I think of every now and then.  Only Duane would get it, and maybe Miss Corn, but enjoy the music anyhow. 
 

Thursday, January 14, 2010

An elf who plays the harp?

So I am still feeling a little emo today, and, I am going to go try to learn a new crochet stitch BECAUSE I CAN.  However, thank you for stopping by my blog today.  Please enjoy the music:



I seriously can't stop listening to it.  I think the melody just fits my mood perfectly. 

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

This post is so emo it could cut your grass.

Alright, as some of you know I have had somewhat of a....rocky(?) relationship for about a year now.  While it wasn't actually THAT rocky as far as relationships go, it was stressful because he lived 2000 MILES AWAY FROM ME.  Yes. This boy (who has a name by the way) lived in New Jersey (his name was Duane haha, you thought I was going to tell you his name in the first set of parenthesis. NOPE TRICKED YOU!). Since I live in Utah, this makes for quite an awkward dating scenario. 

Well, I could go ON, AND ON about the trauma that the relationship had.  Suffice it to say, there was a lot, mostly because of the distance.  Also, because I had three kids, and I have heard that three kids can be scary to a single guy.  I don't know why, they are not very big, nor are they sneaky, so, I have never understood how they 'scare' people. 

Well.  We just really, officially, and for good broke up like for real, for real.  Most of you don't know this, but, Duane and I have been off and on for about 3 months nowish, and for the past 2ish weeks we were "just friends" (I tell you, it doesn't work.  Only Ryley can make it work.)  Generally, it was me running back after three days and saying BLAH I DON'T WANT TO LEAVE YOU BLAH BLECH BLAH. And we would get back together. 

Well.  This time, I deleted him from facebook so that I could not stalk him (which, ps, I actually know his facebook password, so it is sort of a moot point, but it made me feel better about the situation), AND, whoa, wait for it, I took him off my FAVE FIVE on my phone.  This is officially a new age break up.  Just as our relationship was a skypeonship, the new rage of relationships. (Skype is a video chat program, for those of you who didn't get that reference).

The best part about the whole situation is that he is currently dating another girl, which is part of the reason we broke up.  Thank GOD my streak of having boys leave me for other girls has not ended.  I don't know what I would do if boys couldn't use me as a catalyst for new and better exciting relationships.  My identity would be taken from me. 

Alright, alright.  I am not going to whine anymore about it, and this is the only emo post I currently plan on writing, though I can't promise there WON'T be more.  As it is, writing sarcastically about the situation is stopping me from curling up in a ball with a tub of ice cream and bawling while the only coherent words anyone gets from me is "WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME".  Not really.  I am not quite THAT dramatic.

Ok, I probably am, but, not right now at least....

Also, I totally stole this from cutiemcbritish Colin's Tumblr.  And, it is kinda how I feel right now:

"Have you ever been in love? Horrible, isn’t it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life … you give them a piece of you. They didn’t ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn’t your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like “maybe we should be just friends” or “how very perceptive” turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It’s a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. Nothing should be able to do that. Especially not love. I hate love."

He didn't write it, it is from some show or play or something.  Probably something British and cool that we don't have here.  However, it is kind of how I feel right at this moment.

Except I don't hate love.  That is stupid.  I am actually in love with love, and I love to be in love, and I love to be sappy and stuff.  It is fun times.  Until...well I guess until it is no longer fun times. 

Alright, that is all folks. Move along, and forget this post ever happened.  There will be better posts soon. Sorry to go all emo on y'all.  Don't worry about it unless I dye my hair black and start wearing a floor length leather trench coat. 

Actually, scratch that, it would be AWESOME if I started to do that.  Think about it, I could get like leather pants and a leather shirt, and a laser gun, and TOTALLY be the heroine of a sci-fi.  I see, emo's are just the spaceship rebels of the future.  Very cool. 

Wow, this post is long.  Alright everyone MUCHLUF!!! <3

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

I don't procrastinate, I justify.

I really don't have much to say, I just felt like I needed to write because I am being a procrastinator.  You see, I have about 15 loads of laundry that I have to finish.  And no, I am not kidding.  I really have about 15 loads of laundry. 

Ok, I was kidding a little.  I really have five loads that I have to do.  My room is entirely disgusting, and if I ever want to find a man who wants to stay with me, then I suppose I should start at a clean room. I have heard it say that there is a direct correlation to men in your life if you have a clean room. 

Or, was it the way to a man's heart is through is stomach? ANYWAYS, the fact remains that I will just always stay single because I will just keep blogging rather than do the mountain of laundry in my room. 

Le Sigh. 

It is ridiculous how boring I am, and yet, you are all still reading.  That is amazing.  I HEART YOU ALL.

TRAUMA

So, I just had the most traumatic moment.  I SHOULD be asleep, but I am all wound up for a number of reasons, so I thought to myself "self, you should just blog, even though you don't have anything interesting to say".  So, I came to log in, AND I COULDN'T. I got all stressed! I thought that someone had haxed my account or something. 

Oh no, no no, nothing of that sort.  I simply was just inputting the incorrect username.  I had LITERALLY forgotten the name of my blog.  I, am an idiot. 

On that note, I recently discovered today that I am being blog stalked.  Mind you, I usually LOVE being blog stalked, the more people who read my AWESOME blog, the better.  However, this one, is more amusing than most.  Just remember people, that if you think you are a clever e-stalker, then think again, because I have perfected the art of E-stalking.

Not that I am crazy or anything right? I just have a curious nature....or at least that is what I tell myself. 

On a side note, I got a fake scentsy candle.  It is basically Salt City's version of Scentsy, and my room smells delicious now.  MMmmmm. 

Thursday, January 7, 2010

waking up

YES. I KNOW. IT HAS BEEN LIKE TEN DAYS. I am sorry.  The babies have been super sick and life has been a bit traumatic lately.  Here is my day yesterday:

Wake up. Find out the alarm didn't go off and I have to take Severian to school in 5 minutes.  LEAP out of bed. Wake Severian up. Go out into the hall and realize the babies (I call them the trouble twins) are already up and have dumped all my make up in the toilet. Take Severian to school. Come home, fish everything out of the toilet. Pray that the toilet would flush. Toilet doesn't flush. Start crying.  Call my mom to tell her that the babies have broken her toilet.  She comforted me.  Get the toilet fixed. Watch helplessly as Katalina trips and smacks her head against the corner of the wall causing a huge goose egg.  comfort her.  Wake up at 3 in the AM when Severian throws up on my bed.

This, amongst other things. This has been a relatively typical day over the past few days, on top of my weekends where I work 10 hour days, I have just been too tired to blog.  However, I wanted to post a quick post today because now that everyone is healthy and life is once again good, I want to go back to blogging more.

Mostly, today, I got the sweetest, most adorable message, and I thought I would share.  It was this:


"honey, you're my favourite thing to lose sleep over"

Um, my legs went weak for a moment at the cuteness factor of that line.  It was off the adorable charts, and it made my entire day.  Enough that I thought I should blog about it.

 ALRIGHT. THAT being said, everyone should check out THIS site.  It is VERY good times.